Tag: guest post

My name is Cherie Lindberg and I am a Licensed Professional Counselor.

I listen for a living.  I listen to my client’s stories.  People will often ask me how I do it and does it bother me.  I have always been intrigued, and curious by people and what their stories are.

I invite you to go inside and listen as you hear my story and notice what my story invokes in you.

In high school I was told by a guidance counselor not to bother with college.  There had been other experiences similar to this, but I started to tell myself the story that “I am not good enough, I am not smart”.

This young girl who was transitioning to womanhood was crushed.  She wanted to be a teacher, she dreamed of working with Jan Goodall and the chimps, she wanted to explore the world.

Everyone kept asking her what she wanted to be when she grew up.  She had no clue.  When she met a man at 19 and got engaged, people stopped asking her what she wanted to do when she grew up.  She started to tell herself another story. She thought to herself, I guess I will be a wife and mother.  Soon she had her first child at 23 and was pregnant with her second at 25.  That was the day it happened.  Her story inside started to change.  She started to examine her story.  She looked in the mirror at herself and said “What are you doing?  Who are you?”  At that point, I began my journey of going inside and listening.

On the day that I had my second child I was accepted into the University of Wisconsin-Green Bay.  I got my bachelor’s degree and two professors pushed me to go for my masters.  All the while, in the background a little voice with a negative story could be heard.   “You are not smart enough. Who do you think you are? Do you think this is wise?  What about your family?”  Sometimes friends and family would even reinforce these stories and scripts that were going on inside of me.  There were times I was really confused.  I was determined though.  I got myself a therapist and continued to go inside and listen.  I was pretty sure that I could change the voice inside.  That I could recreate a new story!  Through the journey….one that I am still on….I have cultivated my listening skills and continue to create a new story.  One that is my true story.  This story continues to unveil itself as I go inside… I would like to share with you on how I teach others to cultivate these skills.

I would like you to think of your mind as a garden.  You can grow flowers or you can grow weeds.  It is up to us to go inside and work on your mind (just like working a muscle at the gym) to have the garden of your choosing. By going inside and listening we can cultivate the garden of our choice.

Again I am a  psychotherapist and this is what I do in my day job.  I teach and support my clients on going inside, listening and cultivating their garden.  All of us want beautiful, fragrant flowers, but some of us do not know how to cultivate a flower garden.  Some of our role models in life were lost themselves and unaware of their power.  Sometimes the gardens we have inside are filled with weeds (this represents for some of my clients very challenging histories, the stories that live within) for others there may only be a few weeds or some bushes that may need pruning.  Each time my clients are invited to go inside and listen.

We all come into this world whole.  As we grow and develop we adapt to our environment as a way of surviving. Many of us have survival stories.  Our bodies and brains are miracles in that they store and house our stories, they help us adjust and adapt, it truly is amazing!  Our adaptations can serve us or get in the way.  Again, I invite my clients to go inside and listen and explore.  Listen to the stories you tell yourselves.  Together, the client and I go and explore the garden or story and they decide for themselves where the weeds are and where they need to grow flowers. Some of our adaptations turn into defense mechanisms that protect us from harm.  These are the stories we tell ourselves and what we think is real.  However, sometimes these stories are borrowed from others.  Our caregiving experiences, our role models and societal messages all influence our stories.  Sometimes if we are not paying attention these messages become weeds in our garden.  They sneak up on us and we do not even realize there is a big weed in our garden until we react and have turmoil in our life.

By going inside and listening we can nurture the garden of our desires.  All we need is to be willing, willing to listen and when we are ready, willing to take action. We can go inside of our mind and intentionally nurture the story we want to create.  As this point, I introduce my clients to brainspotting.

Brainspotting is a method that teaches clients about the unconscious stories they tell themselves and how some stories can lead to blocks for them in realizing their dreams. It is based on the new knowledge of neuroscience in that we have the ability to change our brains.  It is so very exciting!  We use this tool to support them in nurturing and growing a beautiful garden. Brainspotting helps my clients go inside, to listen, to see, hear and sense their inner garden in a deep way that leads to transformation.   Sometimes there is much work to be done when you are aiming for a magnificent garden!

Everyone of my clients is taught about their inner garden.  How to find their inner garden by going inside and listening, how their garden came to be in the condition it is in and how to grow what they want in their garden.

Brainspotting is one tool I use to support my clients in going to the root of the weeds they see, pulling them and just like using miracle grow they can start to cultivate the beautiful flower garden they desire. First, they need to be willing to go inside and listen.

Back to that young woman I introduced you in the beginning.   That young woman got her Master’s degree and soon saw many unconscious people in the psychology  field.  Many practicing counselors were unconscious of their stories and how they were showing up in their work with clients. I could see how people’s stories positive or negative were influencing how they were showing up in the world and many did not even know it.  Through doing my own Brainspotting I went inside and listened to the story I was telling myself.  Sadly, there were many negative stories inside.  Some of them that were not even mine. Yes, we can carry other people’s stories if we are not aware and confuse them with our own.  I continue to nurture my garden.  I continue to listen.  This has helped me be able to have the courage and vulnerability  to stand before you today and share a piece of myself with you.  That young woman is now an owner of two business, president in to a non-profit and wrapping up my training to become a Brainspotting trainer.

Cherie Lindberg, MSE, LPC, NCC, Brainspotting Consultant and Trainer in Training

Cherie, is founder and owner of Get Connected Counseling, LLC, and Get Connected Consulting, LLC in Appleton, WI.  She is a Licensed Professional Counselor and has been in the counseling field for more than 15 years.  Cherie enjoys counseling with her clients and mentoring the next generation of counselors.  In her private practice her specialties include: innovative counseling methods that support healing.  Check out her website @ www.getconnectedcounseling.com